The Lion's Heart
by Wordgawk
Summary: Squall's friends act strangely around him and he is left to wonder. It's a special day and he doesn't even realize it.


_Disclaimer: As the usual goes, all characters, places and other Squaresoft stuff all belong to...well, Squaresoft. And not me._

_Author notes: Takes place after the end of the game. No major spoilers for those worrying. R, R & R! (Read, Relax and Review!)_

* * *

**_The Lion's Heart_**

"Hiya, there." Dashing footsteps echoed loudly in spacious Balamb Garden as Rinoa Heartilly raced and grappled on to an unexpecting Squall Leonhart's arm. He nearly fell right over at the sudden change of momentum. The dark-haired girl had on a delighted expression, but there was an oddity about it that slowly formed a sinking feeling in the pit of Squall's stomach. Consequent to its swift birth, he felt it plunge. Then he braced himself. 

"Hi." 

"Guess what day it is today?" she chirped in a sing-song voice.

He hated that question. It always meant he either was the world's most favorite person, or the most hated. And it usually was the latter. Now it was a matter of whether he should sound completely oblivious or plain stupid. Hopefully, one of those options would convince her enough.

"Tuesday," he answered with a fake air of confidence, but with a residual hint of stupidity. 

"Um, yeah. But, um, it's something else...." The look displayed on Rinoa's face proved that wasn't the reply she expected. Her scrutinizing was beginning to border on full-out staring and Squall squirmed, remarkably feeling like sinking through the floor. There was a true answer, he well knew, but his mind was drawing a blank. White paper blank. Had the pencil in his visionary hand, even tapped it on his visionary table of thought, but all he got in response was a blink. In other words, not much help. 

He chose to play it dumb. That way, if a slap in the face were his reward, at least he'd have earned it. "All right, you caught me. I don't know what today is. So what is it?"

Her stare was very obvious by now, and Squall was in the process of inquiring about it, but it passed quickly, like a fleeting shadow of a cloud. So he dropped the issue. "It's sunny." Rinoa's reply sounded as though he had asked for a report on the weather, not some big, big surprise she was so joyous about. 

"Sunny." Squall smiled, hoping his nervousness wasn't obvious. When was the explosion going to happen? His anxiety could turn into a full blown panic attack for all he knew. Anticipating any girl's anger was like sitting in a bathtub of cool water with the faucet of hot water on. Just waiting for the temperature to climb and climb, to the point when the water scorches the skin to painful redness. Not a pleasant experience. 

Squall rubbed the back of his neck. "Great. Thanks for the weather update. I was right about to go outside, so that makes all the difference." He kept moving, expecting her to follow, already preparing to be grateful for not being screamed or bashed at. When she didn't move, he paused, risking his demise. But that couldn't happen, not with that gamine expression on her face. Not with those glowing amber eyes....

Rinoa only stood there, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. "I've gotta help Selphie out with something. Can't come. I'll see you later, though?"

Squall's eyes softened as he faced her fully. "It's promised." As an afterthought, he suddenly added, "What are you two doing?"

Her dark eyes revealed surprise, then hesitation. "She's making something for Irvine. She...wants to get a mushy response when she gives him the thing she's brewing up."

"What's the thing?"

She shook her head. "I can't tell you. What kind of friend would I be if Irvine found out?"

"But the element of surprise would be gone if I told him Selphie's planning something," he said slowly.

"Oh, well-" Rinoa shrugged, backing even further away than they were. "Just don't tell him, please? About anything? I've gotta go!" A final wave, then she was gone.

As Squall watched her run off, his eyebrows slowly knotted at a lack of understanding. If Rinoa was busy with Selphie, then was everyone else as well? A part of his heart tugged a little. Here he was, getting worked up and actually looking forward to spending time with real friends, and now that they were busy- 

A firm shake of the head followed. It wasn't certain all of them were busy. It was Rinoa and Selphie he was considering. He was getting paranoid. Walking on, his head jerked in varied directions as he stopped occasionally, hope carrying him along that maybe, just maybe he'd see one of the others. A speck of a certain blond-haired boy fast approached and he resisted the urge to greet him crazily. Even if it was Zell Dincht, whom he had occasional quarrels with, at that moment, Squall plain didn't care. He raised a hand as a greeting and when Zell was in hearing distance said, "Hey Zell, how's-"

"Hey man! How's it goin'?"

And he blazed right by. 

Dazed, Squall let out a sigh and his hand dropped to his side with a slap. "That's what I was about to ask you," he answered aloud to himself. Well, he got what he wanted. He saw someone. But his definition of seeing wasn't quite so literal. Floating on over to the third floor, one of the deck members, Xu, greeted him cheerfully. A small shake of her head was her response when asked if she had seen Irvine or Quistis. 

Back on the first floor, Squall slumped on one of the stone benches which bordered the large, but quaint fish fountain in the very heart of Garden. He flinched when he dropped down too hard. His body turned, facing the fountain, and he watched the clear water swirl. He realized, for the first time since all of them met, every single person was busy meddling with their own lives and he was not. It was always the opposite; he'd submerge into his SeeD work and the others would do the badgering for him to join in on some fun. Now he as the lost one, the one who needed to do the badgering. 

He wished that very instant that Laguna Loire were sitting next to him. Sure the guy could be a bumbling idiot, and he did grate on Squall's nerves, but his open, sincere heart lured him in. His candor, his willingness to befriend others easily...Some quality about that made Laguna a little more bearable. At least if the Estharian were here, there'd be a person to converse with. Of course, provided Laguna changed his ways and let other people speak some, instead of hogging the spotlight all for himself. But Squall's wish was impossible. Laguna would be in Esthar, maybe even around the world, and he wouldn't be able to find the teen. 

Not wanting to ponder of things unattainable, Squall stood, deciding to hop aboard the Ragnarok for a trip to the outside world, in hopes that, perhaps, he could forget about his own for a glimpse of time.  


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

After a few unproductive hours wandering, Squall returned, his brain already cranking out what activity to do next. Sleeping seemed a great idea, but it was early evening. Far too early in the day to doze off. 

_Everyone's still busy, or they actually free? _Squall had walked inside Garden about ten feet when he caught sight of Selphie Tilmitt in the distance running, waving her arms animatedly. 

"Squall! Boy am I glad to see you!" Selphie breathed out as she skidded to a stop in front of the teenager.

"Hi." He rolled his neck slightly, trying to alleviate a crick which he now had noticed. He was taken aback by her enthusiasm. He still had to get used to that. "What's up?"

"Um, I need some help at the quad."

"For what?" He paused, skeptical.

"We're cleaning up for some other people who need it. Everyone's already there."

"And they're not enough help for you?"

"Aw, come on, Squall! We just need one more person to help lift and drag stuff." Selphie clamped on to his arm and attempted to gently persuade him to follow her lead, but he stayed put like a boulder.

"Then go find someone else."

"Don't be so stubborn! We need a big, strong guy to help. You've got to be it because you need to be a part of our group." 

Figuring it was pointless to argue, Squall allowed himself to be towed along. Upon arrival, the quad was pitch dark.

"What happened? Did the power short out?" Selphie stamped her foot in exasperation.

Squinting at the entrance, Squall shook his head. "The lights from the hall are still on. It's just the quad."

"I'll go check around this side for a light switch." He saw her indicate to her left. "Walk forward and see if there's a panel. Maybe it's over there." A small muffled sound came from her, then footsteps faded.

Cautious, he took a few steps forward. He never recalled ever being a time the quad's lights needed to be shut off. Nor had he ever known how dark dark really was. He barely made out seeing his arm when he held it in front. He jumped when the lights overhead unexpectedly snapped on. In front of him, his group of friends yelled, "Surprise!" as they surged forward to meet him. 

Squall kind of stood there, frozen, taking in his party-favored clad friends...overflowing mounds of food on lavishly decorated tables...a pile of assorted gifts wrapped in bright, colorful wrapping, some attached with trailing ribbons...and again his herd of friends running...

"What's this? A party for me? For what?" Squall asked, dumbfounded.

Selphie popped up beside him in glee, a roll of party ribbon in her hand. "The lights are back on."

He shot her a wry look. "So I've noticed." 

"I can't believe it!" Irvine Kinneas exclaimed, looking incredulous.

"Man, I didn't believe Rinoa at first, but now I do!" Zell slapped his thigh as he let out a laugh.

"Squall." Rinoa took him by the shoulders and her eyes held his. "What day is it today?"

"You asked me this morning," he replied, a lame laugh escaping.

"Really." She stepped away.

Squall probed the further recesses of his mind. The date...What was the date? The battle with Ultimecia had undeniably messed up his sense of reality and time. He wasn't even certain if today really was Tuesday. Then it dawned, like the chill in the air right before a pouring rain. "August 23rd...My birthday."

Everyone but him let out a wild cheer. 

"So how'd ya forget your own birthday, anyway?" Irvine inquired once the sound had died down.

He nibbled on his lower lip in thought. "I've been busy. With the battles we fought and all. Makes one forget things sometimes."

"You sure it's not on account of using GF?" Quistis Trepe lightly teased. "I thought for sure you'd use that excuse, but with the new you, there's the show of honesty."

"Me? New?" He pointed at himself, glancing around at all their faces. "Why am I new? When did this happen?"

"It happened," Rinoa moved forward and rested a hand on his arm, "When you met all of us."

"And the new you should be prepped to par-tay!" Selphie pumped a fist in the air. "Let's rock!"

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

Squall had an extraordinary time. He watched a live show of various bands made up from students within Garden. As always, there were jeers, catcalls and hisses for the more provoking songs and enthused clapping and whistles for the more enjoyable ones. He didn't join in on the hooting, affronting, and such. It just didn't seem proper to yell at people you seldom see that their music sucked. Then again, wasn't that the opportunity one had to insult others without feeling remorse?

One thing for sure, Squall didn't think he had never seen so much food on a table in his life until tonight. And he'd never gotten a close look at the real appetites of his friends, hilariously, Zell and Irvine. Zell's eating habits he had momentary view of during the celebratory party the night after Ultimecia's defeat. He was outside with Rinoa at the time, but he managed a peek past her head. Zell was content as he gorged himself with what Squall termed, "Dinner Surprise". The 'surprise' part being not wanting to know what was heaped on his plate. Or the reaction hours later.

The clock hand rolled around and presents jovially needed opening. Packages being shoved in his face, each of Squall's friends begged for theirs to be opened first. All except Rinoa. She didn't have anything. She only shrugged, as if it were her excuse. As he glanced at the others, he saw Quistis was also without anything in hand.

"Squa-all! Whose present are you gonna open first??" Selphie bounced up and down excitedly, delightedly waving her gift above her head.

He pulled out of his observing state. "Yours." Upon hearing the disappointed groans all around, he added reassuringly, "None of you will be left out. I'll get to each one of you."

Opening the small box, he revealed a cassette. Music performed from other students in Garden, Sephie explained when she caught his quizzical look. A nice array of calming songs for those restless nights. And conjuring romance with Rinoa, he caught the implication even before Selphie gave the small nudge to his side. 

Quistis jumped in at this point, saying the tape was her shared gift as well because she had been the one to round up the musicians. Squall inquired why that was such a daunting task and Selphie answered by saying there were skilled, free people but they were unwilling to play. Until Quistis had appeared and requested once more. Without another protest, the males eagerly nodded and from then on they obeyed with a snap of her fingers. 

No females? Squall inquired, but as soon as the words left his mouth, his eyes shifted over to Irvine. Both girls nodded and Squall raised his eyes to the ceiling. Typical girl-vying Irvine. But he had to admit, the plan worked. 

Attention being focused on Irvine, he thrust his package into Squall's arms. Simply wrapped and flat, it seemed so very much like a...Squall hesitated, wondering if he really wanted to be opening it. No, not really, but of course, it was rude if he declined. And that would conjure up more argument and hurt feelings than he was willing to put up with for the evening . He intentionally shielded the gift with the wrapping as his deliberate fingers revealed it inch by inch. He instantly turned scarlet upon discovery of the gold mine.

"Ooooh, Squall's blu-shing!" Rinoa giggled, craning to see what had gotten her boyfriend so agitated.

"What is it, Squa-" Zell began to ask, but he shook his head in bother as the answer hit. "Man!"

"What, what??" Quistis and Selphie practically dove for a look. 

Panicked, Squall clutched the magazine to his chest, his cheeks flaming even more. "Never mind. Nothing to see here." He shot the now innocently smiling Irvine a withering glare. "Thanks a lot."

"Hey, a guy's gotta have fantasies. Even you." Irvine winked and pointed a finger at him.

"Irvine!" The two zealous girls stopped dead in their tracks and contributed with Squall's loathing look upon interpreting his words. 

"Next, please." Squall quickly set down the titillating magazine, making sure it was indistinguishable enough by slipping it back in its wrapper. Pretty much tied it back up to its original state of anonymity.

The last gift came from Zell, and as he handed over to the birthday boy, Squall raised eyebrows at the heavy weight, hopeful that his gift wasn't as lecherous as Irvine's. Zell only smiled. 

He needn't have worried. Nestled in the lavender tissue and blue ribbon (done with Rinoa's insistence), he gasped at the contents. A beautiful figurine, hand-painted in numerous shades of brown, gold, white, and sky blue stared up, meticulously designed into a fierce, roaring lion standing on hard earth, wings adorning its back. The lion appeared to be preparing for flight, for its legs were crouched, wings partly folded in readiness. A small silver plaque engraved with his name decorated the bottom. Squall was astonished. Even the others, who, -apparent by the same shock on their faces which meant they hadn't seen it either- were taken aback. 

It must have taken Zell weeks to complete and Squall voiced it. The blond merely shrugged, almost embarrassed at the sudden bustle of attention he was receiving.

Scrutinizing the figurine, something clicked in Squall's mind. He had seen this design before. Many times, but always fleetingly. He tried to delve into his mind more, but he only came up with pursed, thoughtful lips. 

He looked at Zell, askance. "Where did you-"

"Your gunblade," Zell answered, unsuccessfully suppressing a pleased grin. 

"My gu-" Then it dawned. On the blade near the hilt was an identical image. "How the heck did you manage to get a hold of it? I always have it with me."

The glee on his face beamed even more, like the sun's rays brightening with time. "I can't tell you all my secrets, now can I? You'll just have to agonize over it." 

Squall threw an annoyed look, but his own face unexpectedly broke into a smile and he couldn't pull it off properly. "Thanks." He looked at his friends. "Thank you, everyone. This party has been great. I've been...surprised tonight."

"Surprise good or surprise bad?" Rinoa asked.

Staring down once more at the painted figurine, he replied softly, "Good. All good."   
  


* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * 

The party came to a slow halt. His friends began cleaning up after one last roaring congratulatory cheer, which was loud enough to attract some extra attention from passers-by, to which Birthday Boy again turned embarrassed as outsiders entered the party scene to wish him a happy birthday. He didn't recognize any of the teens (probably because he spent most of his time ignoring them), but it was fascinating. 

He bent down to collect the mess of gift conglomerate and thrown grapes courtesy of Zell and Selphie. Quistis clamped down on his moving arm and said, "Hey, Birthday Boy, we've got it covered. Go and take your goodies to your room. You're free from garbage duty." 

He straighted. Deadpan, he said, "Thank you, Instructor Trepe."

"Oh you, go." She smiled and gently pushed him in the direction of his prizes.

Squall had gathered everything non-shatterable in one arm -Irvine's magazine even more adroitly concealed- and Zell's figurine in the other, but he dubiously thought it an unwise choice. He'd probably need a free arm to move or open _something_. It always happened. 

Just as he was considering who to ask for help, Rinoa sidled up beside him and pried the delicate figure from his grasp. "You need some help?" 

"How did you guess?" Both made their way to the dormitory. It was meant as a rhetorical question, but Rinoa replied simply, "That look on your face. I can tell."

The rest of the trip was silent. After they brought his things inside, Rinoa requested he come with her. To where, was the obvious question, but she wouldn't say. And to add to that strife, she blindfolded him. In doing so, his equilibrium was essentially nil. He kept heading to the walls so frequently, instead of leading him by the hands, Rinoa guided with her arm solidly encircled around his waist. 

Squall recognized the familiar sounds of certain doors sliding open and the footsteps of different people and it frustrated him because he wasn't able to find out where he was walking to. Or more like stumbling. Soon, faint sounds of rushing water pricked at his ears. and he envisioned a horse's own ears tuning in to running water. The rushing sound grew louder, but still muffled, as though it was trapped behind glass. A different, heavy door slid open and a blast of a cool breeze met his face as he stepped out. The sound belonged to the ocean, which roared and was very clear and he knew he was travelling somewhere. But he didn't want to worry about the whereabouts tonight. 

"Can I take this off now?" Squall felt very dumb, being so naive of his location. Outside, clearly, but that wasn't much of a clue. 

The young girl didn't respond. He was led around for another minute before the covering over his eyes finally lifted. 

He blinked, disoriented as he took in his surroundings. He was on the balcony of the flying Garden, the deep night sky decorated with the bare glimmer of stars, many of which were beginning to peek their way to sight. Some had been quick and were already brightly shining, keen to be wished upon. Next to his left foot, a large picnic blanket was spread out, picnic basket included. Scattered pillows filled in some of the empty space between the basket and the other end of the blanket. A tape player was also set up, and Rinoa withdrew a familiar looking tape from the basket. Apparently, the setup had been planned.

"What's this?" he asked, although he already knew the answer.

Rinoa touched her chest. "My present to you. All cordially done, I may mention." An inclination of her head, which Squall took as a small bow. "You like?"

"A little late for a picnic, isn't it?" 

"But do you like?"

The coolness of the sea breeze lessened, and he was suddenly very warm. "Yes. Picnics are always good. Especially when it comes to the food portion of it." Pretending to reach for the basket, he awaited her response. She put on one of her reproachful, yet playful expressions, one hand firmly planted on her hip. 

"I'm hurt. You like the food better than me." A cute pout formed on her lips as she pressed the play button. Soft music wafted into the air and carried itself on the night wind.

Squarely gazing at her, he said in his usual semi-callousway, "But it's good." He cocked his head a fraction at the cassette deck. "So's Selphie's music for me."

Rinoa stepped in front of him and clasped his hands together, soul-searching eyes finding his own. "And I'm not?"

Squall smiled very gently. "No, you're not." He released her hold and entwined his arms around her waist, kissing her with such a softness, a feather would have been jealous.

After they sat down, Rinoa took out paper plates and a cluster of green grapes from the basket. 

"You're not going to start like Zell and Selphie did at the party, are you?" Squall eyed the grapes in her hand.

"Nope. I don't want to be cleaning up afterwards. And as fun as tossing grapes into the sea is, I just wouldn't feel right. Conscience. " Rinoa shook her head as if her explanation was silly. 

They talked for some time, feeding themselves, occasionally each other. Squall bound on to the subject of the morning, of Irvine's reaction from Selphie's gift. A blithe Rinoa gave a girlish giggle, explaining that the time she spent with their female friend was for Rinoa's benefit and not actually Selphie's. _Rinoa_ was the one who planned the thing, and the thing was what Squall was situated at this moment. 

Squall nodded, understanding that their conversation this morning was not his paranoid mind going insane. Which was a good thing. 

A short while after the grapes were finished, Rinoa urged him to lie down and stare at the sky. "You get lost," she added with an assured nod.

He sighed, lying back on the blanket to humor her. The dark sky stretched before him, looming above his head. Stars twinkled, some winked, and the breeze from the ocean was intoxicating. The waves of the churning ocean calmed him some. They suddenly began reaching out for him and he grew very afraid when he found himself floating above the surface of the sea looking upwards, not at all sinking to the bottom like what happened in nightmares. He then had the mental flash of the harsh waves towing him down, embracing him with its icy arms down, down, down. No oxygen, he couldn't breathe. He couldn't take in enough air. His mind was crying out for something he couldn't provide. He was desperate, so terribly desperate. The cold cloud of terror in his mind evaporated the securities locked within and he seized with a numbing fear. 

He shot up, as if doing so would allow him to remain above the water, allowing him to feel safe again, like a person clinging to a life preserver. And Squall heard his name being uttered frantically, the owner of the voice staring intensely as he had with the stars. He didn't know his body had been held so rigidly during those few seconds until he gulped in a few breaths of the night air, trying to convince his brain that water did not fill it and that he was alive. He flopped back down on to his pillow, torso burning. He eventually spoke, assuring Rinoa he was all right, even though that was a lie. 

Rinoa's slow fingers played through his hair and she said in a slightly quavering voice, "Easy there, lion. Where are you going off to? If you're deciding on a whim to jump into the ocean, the least you could do is give me some warning beforehand."

Silence was Squall's front as he gripped back to reality. So much for his love of the ocean. Now it was going to turn into some phobia. And the stars. Scary, them lights. Eventually recovering enough and more or less back to normal, he attempted to push himself up to a sitting position. A resistant tug prevented it and he stopped struggling and sighed.

"Don't make me do that again. Now you see what can happen?" Squall put on his best I-told-you-so look.

"Experience, dear boy. That's all it is." 

"No more, please!" An exaggerated moan sounded.

Rinoa let out a mock sigh. "You win. It's your night, after all." She quieted. The ocean waves filled in the peaceful stillness. Squall's eyes drooped, suddenly feeling like falling asleep with such taciturn. But then Rinoa blurted, "Were you lonely today?"

"I was fine."

"But were you?" 

This time, Squall forced himself up. He expected another restraint, but none came. He traced the edge of the blanket with his forefinger, brushing off a dust mote near his knee. "Have you been inside my head today?" he demanded, sounding a bit more peeved than he intended.

She nudged him with a foot. "No. But I wanna know."

Squall returned back on his elbows, then quickly decided that position hurt, laid back down, making sure not to space out as he looked into the midnight sky and that he wouldn't drown. Or the lights of the sky didn't stop shining. "How would you know? That I'm lonely- was, I mean."

Realizations played across Rinoa's face as implications made its way to her brain, but the expression dissipated. "Because I feel that way whenever I go off by myself. And if I feel it, you probably do too."

"I did...a little. But-" His eyelids closed at the memory. "When I found out there was that party for me, I just was...happy. I felt like such a child."

"Don't tell me you don't allow yourself to do that!" A scuff to his shoulder punctuated her remark. "You have the total right to be one!" Rinoa leaned back on her hands, her tone turning serene. "But it was great that you had fun."

"Yeah. The concert. Your guys' presents, they were so thoughtful. Except Irvine's. That was typical of him. And Zell's. I still can't get over that. Wow. I still don't quite understand how he managed to get my gunblade," Squall said casually, all the while glancing at Rinoa beneath his lashes. She merely shot him a wide-eyed look which said, _Who, me?_

He let out a whistle as he continued. "Anyway, what he made, that was...I didn't know he was capable of such a thing."

Another smack on the arm. Only this time, it really stung and Squall let out a loud cry as he clutched his bicep. "I was kidding, already! Don't be mad!"

"I'm not." Hugging her knees, she stuck the tip of her tongue out. "I'll let Zell deal with you."

A weak groan and a hand on the face was Squall's response. "Thank you."

"Your welcome," she replied giddily.

He moved his hand away, trying to focus on her face. "I mean it. For your gift. I like it."

Rinoa stopped rocking and gazed into his blue eyes, admiration producing a very sweet look on to her face. She saw like that for a long while, then said sincerely, "I have one last thing for you."

Squall watched her. "So where is it?"

"It's here," she said airily, "I just need some help."

He rose to his elbows, but Rinoa pushed him down. 

"You just said-"

"Who said anything about you needing to get up?"

"I don't?"

"Nope. You just stay the way you are and stop worrying about things."

"I don't get it. What about you?" he prodded, back again on his elbows. His recalcitrance earned a irritable look which compelled him right back down.

"I..." Rinoa stroked his hair, "watch over you. We don't want the stars to be falling on you again, now do we?"

"At least not when I'm awake," Squall murmured, shutting his heavy eyes. He couldn't tell what she was doing, and he felt the impulse to open his eyelids to find out, to put his curiosity to rest. But for once, he didn't. He heard her say, "Don't be sad. You have everyone." Lips touched his forehead. 

He smiled at that. 

------------

What did you think? May be a bit sappy, but hey, I felt like sap when typing out this fic. Only natural that there would be residue. But because of it, I think it turned out great. ^_^


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